In a previous article (Under the Influence. It’s More Than You Think), we talked on how being impaired behind the wheel isn’t always about alcohol or drugs, sometimes, it’s things like sleep deprivation that go overlooked. But there’s another gray area when it comes to being “under the influence”, one that many don’t consider: our emotions.

High emotional states can be just as compromising, especially for teens. Take anger, for example. Getting behind the wheel after a heated argument can trigger spikes in adrenaline and heart rate, leading to decision-making that’s reactive rather than thoughtful. This kind of emotional volatility can result in speeding, tailgating, or taking unnecessary risks, all in an attempt to channel that anger. In these moments, rage behind the wheel can be just as impairing as alcohol.

On the flip side, sadness and depression affect driving in quieter but equally dangerous ways. Where anger sparks impulsive reactions, sadness brings intrusive thoughts, mental fog, and slower responses. Both emotional extremes endanger not just the driver, but everyone else on the road.

For teens, emotional regulation is even harder. The prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for judgment and self-control, is still under construction. Meanwhile, the amygdala, which controls emotional responses, is running the show. With these two brain regions wrestling for control, the ability to “press pause” in a charged moment becomes incredibly difficult.

So until the brain finishes developing (hello, age 25), we’ve got to learn how to gentle-parent ourselves in some unconventional ways.

Unconventional Gentle Parenting For Our Emotions

Create a “Feelings Playlist” – Music is a perfect emotional regulator, sometimes you have to curate a new vibe. Check out some of my fave playlists and share some of your own:

Create an “Emotional Dump” – This is where you can go on the notes app on your phone, use an actual notebook or even record yourself just ranting about your feelings. This can be just for you or for a trusted friend so you can talk it out.

Name The Emotion with Precision ‘ We often default to “im sad”, “im depressed”, “im mad” etc. But the moment we can actually accurately pinpoint what emotions we are having, is when you know what to do next. How you can practise this is by saying this like, “I’m angry cuz i feel ignored” now you know the why, what are you now going to do bout this? This technique is called affect labeling and has been proven to calm the brains emotional center.

Grounding with Object – It may seem childish but having something on you that calms and comforts you is always a great option. For instance, you can use a small stuffy like a jellycat or something textured, heck a fidget toy has been proven to be perfect for this and if you don’t want to feel like a child with these items, there are workarounds.
Stuffy = Keychain mini stuffy | Textured item = literally anything you want | Fidget Toy = fidget rings or bracelets. There’s always a way.

Breaking with Ice – The feeling of anxiety, a panic attack or of being overwhelmed can thankfully be remedied with the feeling of extreme cold, like ice. You can chew if, place it on your face/chest or even just splash your face with really cold water

Preventative Measures – Sometimes we need a bit of pre-planning to get through the rough moments. Try some IF/THENs in the instance. “For the future, if I feel myself getting irritated then I’ll remove myself from the situation and come back when I’m ready.